


Walk Before You Run

by HunnyBear



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bisexuality, Church/Carolina Siblings, Daddy Tucker, Drinks make him bold, F/M, Insecure Washington, Let's face it I'm making these up as I go, M/M, Misunderstandings, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pushy Friends, Smut, They mean well, kind of, light fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-07-05
Packaged: 2018-05-20 18:35:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 21,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6020674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HunnyBear/pseuds/HunnyBear
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dating should be simple, right? Dating should only involve yourself, and the person you decide to date. But it seems that in the case of David Washington, dating involves himself, his date Tucker, and literally everyone in his life. Why can't things ever be simple for him?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Who Said Romance Is Dead?

**Author's Note:**

> Happy International Fanworks Day!!!! It has inspired me to come out of retirement from writing and also trying to fill the void RWBY has left in my heart. RvB 14 is coming soon in the next few months, but it won't resolve the infamous cliffhanger. So until then, here's something for my own entertainment. I'm a bit rusty, so tell me what you think.

"I'm not so sure about this guys." Wash said.

"Wash, you wanted to come out with us tonight. Just loosen up and drink your beer you big baby." York ordered.

When Wash said that he was ready to meet some guys again, he was hoping it would be somewhere less loud and dirty. There were peanut shells all over the floor, it stank of a mixture that can only be described as booze, smoke, and puke, and no one seemed to have any qualms about lack of personal hygiene. Its name even sounded dirty: Blood Gulch? What kind of a name for a bar was that? This bar was especially crowded for a Friday night, forcing the three of them to sit together at a round two person table. Men and women were laughing and yelling at an obnoxious volume, it was giving him a headache. His lukewarm beer was little comfort, so was the presence of his two friends sitting next to him.

"Come on Wash, how do you expect to meet anybody if you keep ducking your head all the time?" North asked.

"Sorry North. But I when I said I was ready to meet somebody, I was thinking of a place a little less seedy than this." Wash replied. "Couldn't we have gone somewhere where I could at least meet someone sober?"

"Hookups don't work that way Wash." York said. "You both need to be reasonably drunk, have some sex, then leave in the morning. Or night if it's really bad."

"But I don't want a hook up York, I want to be in a relationship again. What don't you get about that?" Wash complained.

York shook his head and turned his chair so he could fully face Wash. "Wash, you don't get it do you? Have you ever had a random hookup?" He asked.

"No."

"Exactly, you've only been in relationships. It was only with three different people, but they were still in a serious relationship with you." York started.

"Where exactly are you going with this York?" Wash said.

"What I'm saying is that need to have some casual hookups before you get back on the horse. Metaphorically speaking of course. You need to learn to walk before you can run." York answered.

"I'm with York on this one Wash." North spoke up. "It's healthy for the soul to do this every now and then."

"North, what happened to you after you divorced you wife and got custody of Theta?" York asked while still looking at Wash.

"I ran out to meet some women York." North replied.

"And what happened to you North?" York asked.

"I stumbled and fell York." North answered.

"Exactly. Wash, you've been single for a little over a year now. Since you and Maine broke up, you were content in being alone. Now that you're ready to go out into the world and meet some people, baby needs to learn to walk before he can run again." York finished.

"This is stupid. I'm not going to pull a muscle just by finding someone to date again." Wash said. York waved down a waitress and asked for three shots of whiskey. When she returned, she placed them in front of York while trying to show off her cleavage to him. He gave her one of his flirty grins and winked at her. She giggled and walked back to the bar.

"You know if Carolina finds out that you're flirting with random women, she's gonna have to give you another lesson on why no one cheats on her." Wash stated.

"It's harmless. I love Carolina too much to sleep with some random waitress, that's why I'm marrying her. Plus I love my balls too much to forfeit them to Carolina's fists if I cheat on her." York replied. "And I was with plenty of random women before I met her, I got all the hookups out of my system a long time ago. Which is something you need to do Wash."

"York, when I meet people, I don't do it for fun because I want to be with someone for more than a day." Wash replied.

"Wash, can you do this just this once?" North asked. "Just one meaningless fling for our sake and for yours. If you don't like it or you feel like you got your fill, then we can help you find someone to start a relationship with. But tonight, just get out there, find someone hot, and have fun."

Wash placed his head in his hands, gave out a pathetic groan, and ran his fingers through his hair. He grabbed the shots from York and downed each of them one at a time. After the burning sensation calmed down, Wash stood up and walked through the crowed and sat at the bar. He waved down the bartender and asked for a rum and coke.

"Maybe they're right. Maybe I do need a meaningless fling. God knows it's been a while since I've been with anyone." Wash thought. "This will be good for me."

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So apparently since the last time Wash actually went looking for someone to meet, his options weren't great. The first guy he chatted up gave him the creeps. He didn't even get two words out before he offered him "a fun time" at his place. The big knife strapped to his boot didn't help dampen the creepy feeling, so he passed up on his offer. The second person was actually a woman, which really wasn't an issue for Wash, but she was just so dumb! Her large breasts were practically spilling out of her tube top, she reeked of vodka cranberries, and while some guys may find it a perk, was raring to go. She kept saying how she was well experienced and was up for anything, literally anything. She emphasized that several times. Her obnoxious voice became too much too bare so he passed up on her too. She called him a cop then stormed off. After that, it just became to much, and he left the bar to for some fresh air. The cold wind cleared his head a bit, but didn't do much to make him want to go back in there. Funny enough, the bouncy girl from earlier was walking out with two guys and noticed him before she got in their car.

"Say goodbye to the best thing that could've eva happened to ya! FUCKING COP!" She yelled and got into the car and it squealed away.

That was when Wash heard his laugh. He turned around and saw some guy leaning against the wall and crushing his cigarette under his shoe. Wash was taken aback by how handsome he was. He was wearing an zipped up aqua hoodie over his white V-neck, bleach-stained jeans, and black shoes. His dark hair could only be described as rolled out of bed kind of looked, but he made it work. He flashed him an amazing smile that made Wash's palms sweat.

"I'm sorry man, but that was a little funny." He laughed. It took a second before he realized that it was him this mystery guy was talking to.

"What about that did you find funny?" Wash asked.

"I've seen her work her magic over the most stubborn and unwilling men and women. She always goes home with a prize. But that: that right there was a rare sight to see." The guy explained. "You must be pretty strong to resist her temptations."

"I just wasn't interested. She seemed to be a bit... much for my taste." Wash replied.

"Psh- that's putting it lightly." He stepped forward and Wash could finally see his eyes. Somehow, they matched the color of his hoodie, and were fixed on him. He was shorter than Wash by at least four whole inches, but Wash was already 5'10, and he found it somehow made this guy more attractive.

"What's you're name? I've never seen you around these parts before. Are you really a cop?" The guy asked.

"Oh um... I'm Wash- I mean Washington- I mean Wash is short for Washington but um... everybody calls me Wash. And I'm not a cop." He finished lamely. His nervousness didn't phase the stranger a bit. He actually seemed to enjoy seeing him get all twisted up.

"Okay 'Wash is short for Washington', I'm Tucker, and that's not short for anything." He joked and held out his hand. When Wash grabbed it, he was surprised to see how warm he was despite the cold weather. He almost forgot to let go until Tucker looked down at their hands. "You seem a bit out of place here Wash. What are you doing here?"

"Um... I came with my friends, they're still inside." Maybe it was the fact that he felt like he could say anything at this point or probably the liquor, but he didn't stop himself from say this: "I actually came here because they want me to have a hookup tonight, but that's not really my forte. It's my first time back in the field in a while actually."

"Oh really, how long has it been for you?" Tucker asked.

"Over a year now."

"Ouch, that's a bit of time to pass with no action." Wash blushed at this. "Don't feel embarrassed baby. I've gone longer times than that myself."

"Yeah right, look at yourself." Wash really wished he didn't say that, but Tucker seemed to find it very flattering.

"Yeah, this working for you baby?" Tucker slid in closer to him. "Maybe if you want, I can show you the ropes. I promise to be gentle."

Tucker wrapped his right arm around Wash's waist and ran his left hand up and down his arm slowly. Pressed against him, Wash could feel that everything under his clothes was up to par.

"Um... um... what?" Wash asked, looking down at Tucker.

"Ha ha. You know, you're lucky you're really sweet, otherwise I'd think you were high. Plus I have a soft spot for blondes." Tucker stated, moving in closer that their noses were touching. He placed his nervous hands on Tucker's hips, his face flaming up.

"I guess it's my lucky night then." Wash said.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After Tucker managed to persuaded Wash into having a few drinks with him, he invited him back to his apartment. Wash could see in York and North in his peripheral vision the whole time they were together. When it came down to this moment, he gave one last glance to his two friends. North smiled and gave Wash two thumbs up while York had begun to make obscene sexual gestures with his hands and made suggestive faces. Tucker followed his line of vision and saw the two men sitting across the room.

"Are those the friends who dragged you here?" He asked.

"Huh?" Wash turned back to Tucker. "Oh! Yeah, that's them. They seem to be giving me their approval in my choice of partnership tonight."

Tucker gave them a wave, and they realized that they were being a little to obvious and ducked their heads down so as not to scare the stranger off.

"They seem nice." Tucker said.

"You're playing fast and loose with the word nice when it comes to them... well, mainly York." Wash replied.

Tucker laughed at his response. "Sooooo... as to my earlier offer-" He was cut off when his phone began to vibrate. He excused himself from Wash and stepped outside to take his call.

Wash began to panic. Was he making the right decision? He knew very little about this guy and was actually considering going to his apartment for... sex! He didn't even know this guys first name! What did that say about Wash? He looked to his friends once more, and they were waving their hands around. He assumed it meant that he should follow Tucker before he changed his mind. He downed the last of his rum and coke and went out to find Tucker. He was right outside the door still on his phone.

"Alright, thanks for calling me... I can pick him up at ten tomorrow... No, in the morning... Of course I'll be awake by then... Fuck you!... Okay, bye." Tucker pocketed his phone, and realized Wash had joined him outside. Tucker smiled at him. "Hey, I was about to-"

"What's your name?" Wash half yelled nervously.

"What?" Tucker was confused. "I already told you my name."

"No um... I mean your first name." Wash answered.

"Oh! It's Lavernius."

"Lavernius Tucker?"

"Yeah, weird name. I know."

"No no no, it's not weird. It suits you... I'm David, by the way. David Washington."

Tucker gave him a wolfish grin, he held onto Wash's right hand and slipped his own right hand into his back pocket to give Wash's ass a firm squeeze. Wash yelped as Tucker pulled him close.

"David, I like that. So David Washington, do you wanna get out of here?" The way he had said his name made his cheeks flush and his pants get a little tight.

There was one more moment of hesitation before Wash answered, "Yes."

They called for a car service to take them back to Tucker's apartment. The whole ride there Tucker kept his hand on Wash's thigh, slowly creeping closer to where he wanted friction the most and had even started to kiss the side of his neck. Wash hadn't had a moment like this in a long time, so he found himself enjoying the backseat hand play a lot. When Tucker pulled at Wash's collar and bit a rather sensitive part of his neck it caused Wash to make a squeaky noise that made the driver look at them through the review mirror.

"Hey! What's goin' on back there?" The driver asked.

"Nothing!" Tucker and Wash said in unison.

"Better be nothin'. Or I'll kick you both into the street right now!" The driver threatened.

Tucker and Wash tried to stifle their laughter so they wouldn't have to walk the rest of the way to Tucker's apartment. The alcohol was really starting to get to them both so they'd probably get lost if they tried. Despite the fact that drunk Wash wouldn't really mind doing it in the back of a car with Tucker, the sober part of him didn't want an audience that could call the cops on them for public indecency. So Wash had to hold Tucker's hands in his so neither of them could take it any further, and he had to hold on tight when Tucker started to whisper dirty things in his ear. Once the car pulled up to an unfamiliar building, they stumbled out of the car.

"Thank you so much sir for escorting us home!" Tucker yelled at the driver. "You are a gentleman and a scholar! My house is forever in your debt!"

"Go suck a cock!" The driver yelled back as he drove away, this caused Wash to laugh hysterically.

"I PLAN ON IT!" Tucker hollered at the driver.

"ME TOO!" Wash joined, causing them both to laugh. "I don't think hes going to give us a good review." This made them laugh more, but Tucker shushed them. After a brief battle between him and the key sensor, they managed to enter the building. Tucker lead them into the elevator where once the doors were shut, he pushed Wash against the doors and pressed his body against his.

To say that they were eager would be an understatement, Tucker dragged him into a heated kiss, not hesitating the slightest when he slid his hands under his shirt. As he ran his fingers down his stomach, his muscles clenched at the sensation. His shirt starts riding up and Tucker takes advantage of this moment to see what he was working with.

"Fuck dude, do you work out like every waking hour of the day? How do your clothes not rip off half the time?" Tucker asked, completely surprised at Wash's fit physique. This gave Wash a big boost in confidence. His fast fingers probed and touched, teased and tormented Wash until he gathered enough sense to turn the tables on Tucker and rotated them so Tucker was against the door before things ended way too early. He picked Tucker up so they could be at a better height level, which Tucker took as an invitation to wrap his legs around Wash' waist. It had been so long since he's felt so excited and aroused that he could barely breath because his body was in overdrive. Air was overrated anyway. He began to grind against Tucker and pressed his erection hard against his. Tucker started to moan loudly, clawed at Wash's back and begged him to press harder. They should've thought through getting started against the doors of an elevator however, because it wasn't long until they slid open and the two nearly toppled out. Wash managed to catch the side of the door with one hand to keep them from falling and held onto Tucker tight with the other arm. Tucker's legs left Wash's waist and seemed content in letting them dangle as he held on to him tight. Tucker somehow failed to notice this or maybe he just didn't care and as Wash tried to regulate his breathing once more, he took the opportunity to whisper something in Wash's ear.

"Hey baby, let's go play house." He whispered.

"Wha? What are you talkin' about?" Wash asked.

"Yeah, I'll be the door and you can slam me all night long!" He finished.

"Pftt- that's stupid! Does that line ever work with anyone?" Wash chuckled.

"You're right, playing house is for kids! Let's play doctor! I'll let you give me a full physical!" Tucker yelled as he ran down the hall. Wash ran after him, their laughter traveling down the empty hallway. As Tucker tried to figure out which of his key was for his door, whomever was in the apartment across from his started yelling at them through the walls.

"Tucker! Shut the fuck up, or I'll have Tex go kick you in the balls!!" The man hollered.

"Sorry man!" Tucker yelled back as he finally got his door opened and pushed Wash inside.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!" The man yelled.

"YOU FIRST!" Tucker finished as he slammed the door.

Tucker grabbed Wash by the hand and ran them through his dark apartment before he could even get a look around. Once in the bedroom, Tucker pushed an unsteady Wash onto his bed. He pulled off his hoodie and shirt at the same time and seductively sat on top of Wash's lap. He started gyrating his hips, causing Wash to become even more aroused. Wash ran his hands up then down Tucker's stomach and grabbed him by the hips and rolled on top of him.

"Jesus Christ dude, and here I was thinking you'd let me be on top the first round." Tucker slid down until they were pressed tightly against each other.

"Remember how I said it's been a while?" Wash gave a hard thrust against Tucker, making him writhe with pleasure. "That means I'm gonna do my thing, and you better pray to God that you can walk tomorrow."

"Fuck man, I really wish you were a cop now." Wash gave him a confused look. "Uniform, handcuffs, and the way you order me around is so hot! And I wouldn't be apposed to a little bit of... discipline."

"I'm sure I can arrange for something like that to happen in my schedule. Now don't move, or I'll make sure you regret it." He ordered.

"Yes sir!" Tucker grinned.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When morning came, Wash had a splitting headache. Maybe all those drinks weren't such a good idea. Tucker was still sleeping in bed despite the late hour in the morning. He was curled up tight against Wash, which actually quite nice, but Wash was starting to feel a bit restless. It was ten thirty, so Wash figured he slept in long enough. He rolled out of Tucker's bed and pulled his underwear back on. He felt a bit gross and wanted to wash up, but had no clue where the bathroom was. It wasn't like Tucker gave him the grand tour of his apartment when they got there. They were both a bit... preoccupied with other things. He felt his face heat up at the memory of last night. He hadn't been like that with anyone, not with Maine, Connie, or South. He was always a vanilla kind of guy when it came to sex, but Tucker seemed to bring out a side of him that felt natural. And Tucker was so into it he didn't feel all that embarrassed by it. A pretty good first try at a hookup if he was so bold as to say. Wash shook Tucker, but it just barely woke him up.

"Tucker," Wash said. "Where's your bathroom?"

"Mmmh?" Tucker groaned.

"Where's your bathroom?" Wash repeated. "I want to wash up."

"Mmmh... down the hall... to the mfth..." That last bit got lost when Tucker buried his head back into his pillow. At least he knew the general direction of the bathroom now. He walked down the hall, but came upon two doors, one to the left and one to the right. Well, if he got the wrong one, at least he'd know. He opened the door to his right, and suddenly really wished he had picked the door to the left.

This room was painted a soft aqua blue, and the carpets were a dark blue. The curtains were pulled back, lighting up the room in a soft sunny glow. There was a small bed in the room that had fluffy alien pattern pillows and covers on them but no one sleeping in them, in the corner there were a number of fuzzy stuffed animals in a basket, and by the window was a dresser with a picture on it. It was of Tucker holding a small boy that looked like a little version of him, but the boy's aqua eyes had specks of dark blue in them. They were both smiling, which was the exact opposite Wash felt like doing.

"Oh my God he's married." Wash thought. He rushed out of the room and back to Tucker's room, he grabbed his pants and pulled them back on. His stumbling around caused Tucker to wake up again.

"Mmmh? Wash, what are you doing?" Tucker asked.

"Um- uh- I gotta go." Wash stuttered out.

"What? Wash, it's still pretty early. At least let me make you some coffee." Tucker suggested.

"No um, I can't stay." Wash said, still struggling to get his clothes back on.

"Why? Baby, what's wrong?" Tucker finally sat up, pulling a pair of sweats from the floor around his waist.

"Wrong? Wrong?! I'll tell you what's wrong! You're married!" Wash exclaimed.

"What?! Since when?" Tucker asked. He opened the drawer of his nightstand and put on a pair of glasses.

"Glasses? He wasn't wearing glasses last night." Wash thought, pausing slipping on his shoes. "Wow, that somehow makes him- no! Focus!"

"Look, I know I said I was looking for a fling, but I wasn't looking for it from a married man!" Wash grabbed his jacket off the floor, and started marching out. Tucker chased after him and grabbed him by the arm.

"Wash, I'm not married! Why would you think-" Tucker got cut off when they heard his front door opened.

"Tucker? You here?" A woman called out.

"Ah shit. What the hell is she doing here?!" Tucker said. Wash pulled away from him and went out to the living room where the woman was waiting. Of course she was beautiful, it was just his luck. She had her long blonde hair pulled up into a ponytail, was wearing an olive green tank top, black skinny jeans, and leather heeled boots. In her arms was the toddler from the picture in footie pajamas, looking curiously at Wash with his intense eyes. This confirmed all of Wash's fears, and Tucker looked like he was panicking a little.

"Okay, I know how this looks. But I swear to you Wash, she's not my wife!" Tucker cried.

"Tucker, what the fuck is going on?" The woman asked.

"Tex, I told you to stop saying fuck in front of my kid!" Tucker said. He walked up to her, took the boy from her arms, and kissed his forehead. "Hey Junior. How's my little guy?"

"Blarg!" Junior squealed.

"Tucker, what is going on? What kind of lies are you telling this guy?!" Tex asked.

"I'm not telling him anything, it's just a very bad misunderstanding!" Tucker explained. "Wash, this is Allison, we call her Tex. She occasionally babysits for me."

"Yeah guy, I'm not his wife. I wouldn't be caught dead married to him. I've got too much self respect... no offense guy." She said.

"Yeah um... what?" Wash stuttered.

"I only babysit his kid every now and then. And someone other than Tucker currently occupies the position of husband. Tucker, can't you ever meet someone without them hating you?" Tex criticized.

"It's not like I do this on purpose." Tucker said as he balanced his son on his hip. "And what are you doing here? I was going to pick him up at ten."

"Dumb ass, it's ten thirty." Tex barked at him. "You know, when I said I'd take Junior for the night so you could go out, I didn't think you'd be out looking for a midnight treat."

Wash's face felt like it was on fire, and Tucker hurriedly ushered Tex out. "Thank you Tex. You know I always appreciate you and worship the ground you walk on, but you need to get you're ass out of here!"

"Yeah yeah, wouldn't want to interrupt play time!" She hollered out before Tucker slammed the door shut and turned to faced Wash.

"So um... do you want some coffee now?" He asked. Wash nodded his head and sat down on Tucker's table. Tucker pulled up a highchair to the corner of the table and placed his son in it. He fixed Junior a bowl of yogurt drops, which Junior happily began to eat. After he started the coffee maker and sat down at the table, Junior's highchair separating him from Wash. There was a few moments of silence before Tucker spoke up.

"Well... that was a thing." He said.

"Yeah." There was another moment of silence. "So... that wasn't your wife?"

"Oh God no!" Tucker replied, shaking his head. "I mean she's super hot and all, but she kind of hates me, is a total bitch, and has beaten me up on a few occasions for commenting on her ass. But she likes Junior and will take him off my hands when I need a night to myself every now and then. She lives across the hall with her husband Church. The guy who was yelling at us last night."

"Wait, Church?" Wash asked.

"Yeah, it's his last name, and ironically he's jew-"

"Any relation to Carolina Church?"

"Red head with a bad attitude and a fondness for the color blue?"

"Well I wouldn't say bad attitude, just very... strong opinions."

"That sounds like Carolina. Wait, how do you know her?"

"I'm good friends with her and her fiancé. I think I met her brother once. She doesn't really like to talk about her family, not even with York."

"Yeah, Church says she doesn't hold a high opinion on him marrying Tex."

"Really?"

"Well, what she really said involved a lot more yelling and swear words. But on account of my kid who's sucking in new words like a sponge, I figure I shouldn't go into great detail."

"Right... so she isn't your wife, but this is your son?" Junior chose that moment to tip his bowl over, spreading his yogurt drops all over his tray and giggled. Tucker ruffled his son's hair and snatched one of the yogurt drops.

"Yep, my pride and joy." Tucker said fondly. "I uh, probably should've mentioned him before."

"No no, I understand. You don't go around to guys you pick up at bars and tell them you've got a kid." Wash said.

"I was being honest with you on that. I don't go around picking up guys or girls at bars as much anymore since I got Junior." Tucker admitted.

"Since you're not married and I don't actually see any traces of a woman living here, I can assume his mother isn't in the picture anymore?" Wash asked.

"You assume correctly." Tucker answered. "Long story short, a little over three years ago, I pick up this chick at a bar. Super tall, super pale, and super hot foreign chick from a country called Sanghelios. She barely spoke any English, but the Doctor of Love doesn't get this far without picking up a few tricks." Wash rolled his eyes. "After using some of my best Sangheili pick up lines, I managed to get her back to my place. We screw, she gives me the slip in the morning, and I don't really care enough to find her again. The sex was kinda meh and she kept saying how she's never done it with a black guy before, and not in the flattering way. Then on some random day several months later, I'm at home playing video games when I hear this loud banging on the door. I answer the door without checking who it is first like a fricking idiot and this huge guy- and when I say huge, I mean built like a fuck- I mean fricking tank- and the guy just starts beating the shit out of me. But luckily I'm fast, and I ran into the hall and started yelling for Church to help me. He and Tex come in and managed to get the guy off of me. He's sweating, red in the face, covered in bits of my blood, and is yelling at me in Sangheili. My head was spinning and it didn't translate well, but I could make out something along the lines of 'whore, bastard, wife, cock sucker, and baby'. So I'm like, 'Dude, what the hell are you talking about?'"

Turns out, that Sangheili chick I banged nine months previous was not only married, but got pregnant and managed to get her husband to think it was his. But when a black baby is born to two white Sangheilis, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that the baby doesn't belong to you. The guy lost his mind and she decided to tell him it was mine and where I lived. The cops arrest him, I go to the same hospital where my kid is to get patched up and straighten this out. But while the chick's husband was beating me up, she ran out of the hospital and left our kid behind. A quick paternity test later and suddenly I've got a nameless newborn baby. So I've spent the past couple of years raising him, which has been cool. He's too much like me for his own good."

"She's never tried to contact you?" Wash asked.

"Nope. I actually haven't seen her since the night we made Junior. There were a few letters sent to her apartment about how if she didn't come back she would automatically forfeit any claims she had to Junior. Her husband wanted nothing to do with them anymore so he's no longer a concern. And six or seven months passed with no response and I got full custody. Even if she were to just show up randomly wanting Junior back, she'd have to come up with like the mother of all excuses as to why she ran out on us and never responded to the letters." Tucker finished.

Wash wasn't sure what to do with this new information. He watched Tucker fondly interact with his son, feeling a bit calmer about their situation.

"What was the long version of that story?" Wash asked curiously.

Tucker sat up straight. "Oh well, usually when I tell it I go more into detail about the sex, the beating, the early days with Junior, bring it around to the sex again somehow-"

"Jesus Christ, I would not need to know all of that." Wash said and chuckled a little.

"That's why I gave you the short version bitch- I mean dude." That made Wash chuckle more. "What? This whole 'no swearing' policy is a recent development for us."

"You always this honest to guys you bring home for one night stands?" Wash asked sarcastically.

"Just to the ones I want to stick around." Tucker said, Wash gave him a kind smile. "So baby, what are you doing tonight besides me?"

"Oh God, those lines are worse now that I'm sober!" Wash joked.

"Well get ready baby, I've got a lot more where those came from!" Tucker said as Wash started to laugh which caused Junior to start laughing.

"Well this certainly wasn't what I was picturing when I agreed to try and have a hook up." Wash thought to himself, "But it's okay, I guess it technically wasn't a hookup if he invited me to stay... so North and York can suck it!"


	2. What Do You Do For Money Honey?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after a fling has never gone so smoothly. Unfortunately for them, they both have friends who think they know better about this kind of thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to let this story stay in the perspective of Wash, but now it's going to bounce around between the characters a bit to fill in some plot holes. But it'll probably mainly be Wash's POV most of the time. The cast will probably get bigger as the story goes, so keep an eye out for some familiar friends.

"So wait, you mean to tell me this guy Caboose somehow managed to cause a blackout, set a copy machine on fire, and electrocuted you in one morning?" Wash asked in disbelief.

"You'd be surprised what Caboose can accomplish in one morning. One time he was talking to Church's secretary Sheila-whom he is totally crazy in love with-which he managed by saying he needed to borrow her stapler. While trying to staple the papers and talk to her at the same time, he somehow stapled his own tie to the papers.. four times before he noticed! She had to get the staples out and he hid inside Church's office the rest of the day because he was so embarrassed." Tucker explained.

"That's so sad!" Wash laughed.

"It was sad for Church! He was the one who had to deal with a weepy Caboose in his office all day. He is a loud crier, and kept trying to hug Church." Tucker said.

"Does she like him back?" Wash asked.

"For some crazy reason I think she does, because-" Tucker was cut off when Junior toddled over to where they were sitting on the couch with a paper covered in multi-colored scribbles. "That's awesome Junior! Can you make another one for me?"

Things had been going surprisingly well so far. He and Tucker actually hit it off once everything had calmed down and his hangover had worn off, and Wash had found that he liked Tucker beyond the fact that he was hot and great in bed. Aside from his somewhat immature behavior and need to find a place to insert a sex joke into the conversation every so often, he was actually quite charming. They had spent what was left of the morning talking and getting to know each other beyond what was learned the previous night, which wasn't a lot. They were in the middle of talking about Tucker's job at a software development company called Command Industries where he worked with his neighbor Church and his sister Carolina. 'Work with' was a bit of a stretch apparently seeing as Tucker's job had nothing to do with software development, Wash was beginning to find out.

"So tell me again what it is exactly you do for Command?" Wash asked.

"I translate for them." Tucker said as he turned back to Wash after watching his son toddle back to his little drawing table. "One of Command's biggest partners is a Sanghelio based corporation. When I started working there, it was before they were partnered. I was technically hired as Church's personal assistant, which is really just a fancy term for 'the guy Church rants to about shit and throws papers at'. But a couple of years ago, Church told be about how they were having trouble building the partnership that Carolina was in charge of, which wasn't technically her fault because they said they didn't trust a woman to have their best interest at heart, and one day all hell broke loose. You ever been at the receiving end of Carolina's fury?"

Wash shifted uncomfortably in his chair at the memory of Carolina taking her anger out on his body because he did something stupid, which thankfully wasn't that often, but often enough that the fear was still there.

"Yeah, it ain't pretty. Then things were thrown, words were exchanged, and Church called security to escort Carolina back to her office until the meeting was over. So then it was thrust upon Church to seal the deal with the Sangheilis or his and Carolina's jobs were in jeopardy, so he had me come in and translate for him. Also because Carolina broke the jaw of the Sangheili's translator so he couldn't really translate anymore. I managed to smooth things over, apparently when I started saying what a bitch Carolina was and how awesome Church was, they started to relax and were open to letting things be even between them and Carolina. Church got the partnership and I was promoted to their official translator. I'm pretty sure it's just a bullshit job, but I get paid way more, I only have to show up at work during important meeting, and they only throw files at me now."

"What did they throw before?"

"Oh laptops, books, staplers, an occasional chair. It's all cool now."

"Sangheili isn't really a common language on this side of the world. At least I've never met anyone who used it as a second language. How do you know it?"

"I'm not gonna tell you."

"Why?"

"You gotta leave some mystery to be discovered at a later time."

"Come on, just tell me."

"You're gonna think it's stupid."

"I probably will, but tell me anyway."

"Okay. When I was in high school, I went to an all boys school with Church, it was where we first met. As you can imagine, a bunch of teenage boys filled with hormones and no girls around to share them with can make a guy go a little crazy. I think that's why Church ended up marrying Tex, she was the first girl he ever did it with. Don't tell her I told you that, she'll kill me." 

Wash rolled his eyes. "Then don't say it if you know she'll kick your ass."

"What's life without a little risk? Anyway, so I was a fifteen year old sophomore, I was all hot and bothered, and the only girls I knew were the middle aged lunch ladies. Then on one magical day, God decided to do me a solid and gave me Miss Pilot."

"Who is Miss Pilot?"

"Only the hottest teacher I ever had the good fortune of knowing in real life. She was hired on to teach a new language class: Sangheili. I just started taking a French class, which I planned to use to get girls to do it with me, when I begged my councilor to let me transfer to Miss Pilot's class because I said I didn't like French anymore. It was still early in the semester so he transferred me into her class, along Church and every other guy who was desperate to spend an hour gawking at her. And I had somehow convinced myself that if I was her best student, it would help my chances in getting her to have sex with me."

"What?! Tucker that's ridiculous, you were fifteen! And she was what, twenty eight? She would go to jail!"

"One: she was twenty four, not twenty eight. Second: I was a fifteen year old who was desperate to lose his virginity, it couldn't hurt to try. Also whenever I got an A+ on a test she would hug me, like a full body hug. That made it all worth it. So I was top of her class for three years straight, Church stopped taking it after the first year because he was a asshole who didn't bother to study. It cost me passing a couple of other classes, but no biggie, I still graduated. And no, we never had sex. But apparently becoming fluent in an obscure language comes in handy later in life."

"Yeah, the moral of this story is hormone driven stupidity pays off in the end."

"Don't be jelly, baby. Miss Pilot is old news," Tucker leaped onto Wash's lap and wrapped his arms around his neck. "you're the only one I want to get good grades for now."

He started kissing down Wash's neck, causing him to gasp and placed his hands on Tucker's waist. Tucker's trail of kisses lead back up to Wash' lips, and Wash lifted a hand and tangled it in Tucker's hair, pulling him closer. Fuck, Wash could feel his pants getting tighter already, and he could feel Tucker's smile as they kissed. Tucker broke their kiss and gently ran his fingertips over Wash's lips, looking into his eyes with an honest hunger that shocked Wash. They hadn't even known each other for a whole day and there was already this energy between them, how was this even possible? When Wash was going to pull back and hit the breaks on this Tucker slipped his tongue in his mouth and ground down on him, and he couldn't help but let out a pleasant groan. Well, there wasn't any laws against him having some hot over the clothes action. But then they were disturbed when something bit him on his left calf through his jeans.

"Ow! Son of a bitch!" Wash yelped.

Tucker turned his head and saw that Junior had sunk his teeth into Wash's leg. "Oh fuck Wash! Don't move, I'll get him off!!" Tucker slid back to his seat and bent over to remove his son from Wash's leg. After a bit of failed pulling and pleading, Tucker pinched Junior's nose so he would be forced to let got to breath. He sat him on his knee and said, "Junior, I thought you grew out of your taste for blood. You know biting people is bad."

"Blarg!" Junior said as if he were outraged and gave his father a pout.

"Did you say 'taste for blood'?!" Wash asked, slightly frightened at this.

"I don't mean that literally. It's just that when he started teething he kept trying to bite people instead of his teething toys. It was a dark time for both of us, but eventually he got used to his toys and it wasn't a problem anymore. Why did you bite him?"

"Honk!" Junior just pointed at Wash with an angry look in his eyes.

"No more biting Wash, Junior. That's daddy's job." He kissed the top of Junior's head and put him back down. Junior gave Wash another angry look and growled at him before walking away. It was safe to say that Junior was the scariest toddler that Wash had ever met.

"Sorry about that, he's usually not like that. Are you okay?" Tucker asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Wash said, rubbing his hurt leg. "It's not like he broke the skin or anything."

"My poor little baby, let me kiss it and make it better." Tucker said as he kissed Wash's cheek.

"Shut up." Wash pushed his head away endearingly. Tucker laughed and adjusted his glasses since Wash almost knocked them off.

"So Wash," Tucker started, "do you wanna do something with me tomorrow night?"

"'Do I wanna do something'? Really, that's how you're going to ask me out? What are we, in the eighth grade? Next are you going to ask me if I want to go to the spring formal with you?" Wash laughed.

Tucker smacked his chest. "Shut up, or I'll take back my offer and kick you out! Do you wanna or not?"

"Heh, sure. Let's do something tomorrow night." Wash and Tucker pulled out their phones and handed it to one another so they could program their numbers into it.

"Jesus, it says here you have sixty unread texts and twenty missed calls! What the hell have I been keeping you from?!" Tucker exclaimed as he showed Wash the screen of his phone. Wash knew what that meant.

"That would be courtesy of the two guys who brought me out last night to the bar. They're as nosy as they are meddling and are probably dying to know how last night went. I'm honestly surprised there aren't more than that." Wash said.

"You run in an interesting social circle Washington." They swapped phones again.

"But I actually do have to leave, I have work." Wash stood up and fixed his clothes. Tucker got up with him and walked him to the front door. He glanced to his son to make sure he wasn't looking before modestly kissing Wash. It was actually quite sweet, until Tucker sneaked his hands down and gripped Wash's ass.

"Tucker!" Wash hissed.

"My God, you have such a tight ass!" Tucker whispered seductively. "I could bounce a nickle off it."

"God, you need to learn to shut up." Wash growled.

"You found a very effective way to shut me up last night." Wash's face lit up pink and Tucker grinned at this accomplishment. "I'll call you later?"

"Sure." Wash smiled.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Wait wait wait, you mean to tell me after all of that, you and him are going out now?!" York asked as he picked up his dumbbells. "You met him in a bar, had drunk sex with him, found out he has a kid, and now you are dating him?"

"In a nut shell: yes, that is an excellent summery." Wash answered.

"You sure this is a good idea, Wash? To date someone you had a hookup with first?" North asked.

"I really like him. I think it can turn into something more. It's not the greatest love story of our generation type situation, but I feel good about it." Wash replied.

Wash should've felt lucky. North and York waited a full ten hours before bombarding his phone with calls and texts for information on his first hookup. By the time he got home and checked his phone, it was riddled with more texts from them about how they were dying to know how it went. He couldn't avoid them for long, they worked together and would corner him sometime soon and the longer he put it off the worse it would be for him. So he called them up and said he would tell them when they went to their gym Project Fitness, which they were all part owners of. Of course, they wasted no time and asked question after question, almost all of which he responded "I'm not going to answer that!" It was going well, until he told them that a hookup evolved into the beginnings of a relationship.

"I'm sorry guys, but I don't think it's a good idea." York stated. "I mean come on Wash, you haven't been with anyone in over a year since you're last boyfriend!"

Wash really didn't like to talk about Maine, not with the way things ended between them. "Maine has nothing to do with this York. I like Tucker."

"How do you know for sure? For all you know, you're just high on the fumes of a rebound and once you come down, there's this guy who wants a relationship with you and you don't anymore. It's not fair to him and it's not fair to you. I say you put off getting too serious yet until you're entirely sure." York suggested.

"Tucker isn't a rebound York. I would know if it's a rebound and it's not a rebound. And I don't think you can rebound after a year of being single."

"How is this not a rebound? You've never had a rebound before, you went from one relationship to the next. You're first girlfriend, South dumped you, and you bounced back pretty fast because you were secretly happy she ended it, as I'm sure we all were. After her was that cunt Connie who cheated on you with that Mohawk guy, so no love lost there. Then it was Maine and... well, we all knew you went on a sexual hiatus after him. You've never had a fling before. What happened to the "Walk before you run" analogy I gave you? You're not walking, you're sprinting!"

"My God, you guys are like the worst older sisters ever. Of all time."

"That may be true, but it doesn't change the fact that this is a little bit insane. I mean, what do you even really know about this guy?"

"That's what dating is for, York. I'm going to get to know him tomorrow night." Wash said.

"You don't even know what he does for a living?" North asked.

"No, he told me that. He's a translator, he's fluent in Sangheili and the company he works for is partnered with a big Sanghelios company. He sits in at meetings and translates for both sides."

"That's it? That's the extent of his job? It can't pay much." North said.

"Actually, it does. It's a hard language to learn and isn't that popular outside of the country of Sanghelios. Apparently it's hard to find someone who speaks both languages and isn't utterly terrified of this these guys. There's usually a lot of yelling, things being thrown, and threats of disembowelment at these meetings. As long as Tucker correctly translates and doesn't run out in terror in the middle of meetings, they pay him a lot."

"How much?" York asked.

"I'm not going to answer that." Wash said.

"And it doesn't bother you at all that he has a kid?" York asked.

"Excuse me? Is there something bad about dating a single dad York?" North asked, taking offense as a single father himself.

"No, I'm not saying that North." York said carefully. "I'm just saying that dating a guy he barely knows with that much baggage so soon may not be such a good idea for him."

"It doesn't bother me that he has a child. It's just that..." Wash trailed off.

"Just what?" North asked.

"I don't think his son likes me." Wash answered, slightly embarrassed.

"That's not surprising. Children sometimes have trouble adjusting to a new person in their parent's life. Of course he won't like you yet." North responded. "How old is he, five? Six?"

"...He's two." Wash said.

"I'm sorry, maybe I misheard." York said. "Did you just say that this kid is two? How does a two year old not like someone? He's still technically a baby, babies like everyone!"

"Pft- you have obviously never had a baby before." North muttered to himself.

"I don't know, but this one does!" Wash said. "Whenever he looks at me he always has this angry look in his eyes. Today when Tucker and I were hanging out he bit me!"

"Pfft- Ha! Only you could get a two year old kid to hate you, Wash." York laughed.

"Shut up!" Wash yelled. They returned to lifting weights when Wash remembered something. "Oh yeah, York. You'll never guess who lives across the hall from Tucker."

"Who?"

"Carolina's brother." Wash said. York dropped his weights out of shock, causing a loud bang that made half the room look at them. After an awkward silence, everyone went back to their own business and Wash asked, "Are you okay York?"

"You're sure it's Carolina's brother? My Carolina, as in the oldest of the two Church siblings? Her brother lives across the hall from your new squeeze?" York asked.

"Yeah. The place Tucker works for is Command. He's Church's friend." Wash responded.

"Jesus Christ, it's a small world." North laughed, picking up the weights York abandoned.

"Wait, is this the same Tucker who hits on my fiance at work? The one Carolina has been trying to get fired for the past year? She hates him." York stated.

"He's not that bad York. Carolina hates everyone." Wash wasn't technically lying, it was very easy to get on Carolina's hate list.

"But still, this is the guy you want to start a relationship with?!" York asked incredulously.

"I'm not saying I'm ready to pick china patterns with him. I'm just interested in dating him and seeing where it goes." Wash answered.

"Man, he must've rocked your world if you're willing to invoke the wrath that is my future wife. This will not get her stamp of approval." York said.

"It's not about sex!" It's wasn't completely about it anyway.

"So then he wasn't any good?" York asked.

"No, he was fantastic, I'm saying-" Wash got cut off.

"Ooooo. Now we're getting somewhere!" York cheered.

"Would you shut up?!" Wash demanded. "I really like him. And I'm sure Carolina will be fine with it."

"Man, have you met Carolina?" North asked.

"...Yeah, maybe I'll put off telling her about it for a little while. At least until I know it's going somewhere." Wash decided.

"What's going somewhere?" They turned around and saw North's twin sister South standing there. She was one of the gym's personal trainers, so it was no surprise she was there. Wash tensed up, knowing South had the potential to tattle on him to Carolina.

"Wash is dating someone Carolina hates." York told her. Wash hit him in the arm and made a face that said, "Dude, what the fuck are you doing?!"

There was a moment of silence before South started to laugh. Wash blushed and pleaded, "Please don't tell Carolina."

"HA! Dude, I won't tell her if you promise to let me be there when you do! She's gonna rip you apart!" South walked toward the locker rooms, still laughing.

"You know, I thought when we first met South was just in a bad mood and that's why she was so mean." Wash said. "It's been years since then and she is still mean."

"You're telling me, I grew up with her. And believe me, it doesn't help when you're always referred to as the 'mean twin' all the time." North said.

Wash sometimes forgot that he and South used to date, it was a while ago and it didn't last that long. It started years ago when Wash was twenty two and York started poking fun at him for never having sex before. He was young and never really thought of dating or sex as a priority, until he became friends with York and North. The two of them loved to meddle in Wash's love life. So as a joke, he asked North's twin sister South out, he didn't expect her to say yes, at least her own way, "Sure, why not?". Nothing really changed between the two of them, they started sitting next to each other more, she took his virginity after a month of being together, and one day he just started calling her his girlfriend. Plus it was great material to torment North, saying how if he and South got married they would be brothers-in-law. North didn't like the idea of anyone defiling his sister, let alone his best friend. York started to ask if North if he could feel Wash giving it to South at night since they were twins and North just started to cover his ears. They were together for three months before South dumped him because she was tired of being with him. North thanked whatever God that listened to his prayers at night, as did Wash. She kind of treated him like crap and was always in a surly mood. He already got enough of that back when they were just friends.

"Back to our main point: Wash, are you absolutely sure this is the kind of guy you want to start something serious with?" North asked.

"Well... yeah." Wash said.

"Then, best of luck to the both of you I guess." North decided.

"Sorry Wash, I'm still not on board with this." York decided.

"Well then you'll just have to find a way to live with it, seeing as it's both your faults that I met him in the first place." Wash decreed.

"Alright, we'll back off for the time being." North promised. "Right York?"

"Fine, but if we see this heading down a bad path we will intervene for your own good." York said.

"And by the way Wash, remember that the longer you put off telling Carolina, the worse it will be for you. And us for knowing about it and not telling her." North said.

"Yeah yeah, I know." Wash said.

Jeez, were all friends as bad as his were?

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tucker on the other hand was having an easier time breaking the news to his friends than Wash was. All be it Church doesn't really give two fucks about who Tucker sleeps with, but hearing that he was in the makings of getting boyfriend was relatively interesting. Tucker probably wouldn't have even told Church at all if it wasn't the fact that it was a slow day at work for both of them, and that was saying something for Church. He practically ran this place along side Carolina. But he and Tucker were sitting in an empty conference room waiting for the Sangheilis to arrive for their meeting, and were already an hour late. It was either stew in silence, or resort to conversations. They chose the latter.

"So who is this guy?" Church asked.

"His name is Washington. I met at a bar a the other day." Tucker said.

"And you slept with him?" Church asked. "And now you are going out with him tonight on a date?"

"Yes." Tucker confirmed.

"This doesn't sound at all backwards to you?"

"No offense, I don't think you should be the one preaching about 'proper' relationships."

"Point taken."

"So I'm gonna need you and Tex to watch Junior tonight." Tucker requested.

"You know, Tex and I could have plans tonight other than taking care of your damn kid. I mean we don't but that's not the point. Get an actual baby sitter!" Church ordered.

"What's the matter Church? Afraid that Junior is gonna give Tex a bad case of baby fever?" Tucker teased.

Church rolled his eyes. "Pft- please. Tex is the last person who would ever want to have a baby. Can you imagine what a pregnant Tex would be like?"

Tucker briefly imagined Tex pregnant, threatening to kick his ass while not even being able stand up without help due to a human child growing inside of her. It made him laugh, but it didn't make her any less intimidating in his head.

"You mean she's the last person who would ever want YOUR baby, right?" Tucker joked, which earned him a swift smack in the back of the head.

"Of the two of us, you're the last person who should be procreating." Church stated. "I have an IQ of 177, at least any kid I have will have brains."

"Junior doesn't need brains, that kid will glide through life on looks alone." Tucker bragged.

"Yes Tucker, because that's the dream for all parents." Church scoffed.

Tucker remembered the first time Church officially met Junior. He left for a two week long business trip the day after he was born, so by the time he came home he saw his wife and friend catering to a small baby that looked like a tiny clone of him. It was all very sudden, to go from a self proclaimed playboy to a father. They all thought his son would be better off in foster care than being raised by him. But after locking himself in a closet to have a three hour long panic attack a day after returning from the hospital, he emerged ready to be what his son needed him to be. So by the time Church came home, Tucker had gone through a drastic change. He was so shocked when he was introduced to Junior, he just gave the baby an awkward handshake.

"Besides, you burned out a big chunk of your brain cells back in college. Remember those long nights you used to hustle other students out of their savings by betting them you couldn't solve advanced math equations after drinking your weight in tequila?" Tucker asked.

"Oh God it hurts to even think about it." Church moaned.

"Remember that game you played where you would take a shot after every number of Pi you could recite? Every number got you ten dollars from anyone who thought you would get it wrong." Tucker remembered. "What was your record?"

"I think the highest I could ever go was 26 before passing out or puking. The trick is you got to drink fast and never look back." Church said. "It's a miracle I never died of alcohol poisoning."

"You are such a light weight." Tucker criticized.

"Hey, you could never make it past like six digits. And not because of the alcohol, you just couldn't memorize the numbers." Church said.

"Well who the hell gives a fuck about Pi?! Certainly never did me any favors." Church face palmed himself.

"Where the fuck are these assholes?!" Tucker groaned. "I didn't leave the comfort of my home to be stood up like some cheap date."

"Who knows? Maybe some guy cut them off on the freeway and they're currently feasting on his flesh as retribution." Church guessed.

"Dude, don't even joke about that." Tucker said. "I would not put it past them to do that. Seriously, I wouldn't even be surprised if at least half of those scary fucks have killed someone."

"And you're next buddy." Church joked.

"Hey! At least they've grown to like me. I still don't get why they like you so much." Tucker wasn't wrong. These people hung on Church's every last word, as if he was God or something. Church was really good at his job and all, but even when he had to bring them bad news, it was always somehow Tucker's fault and not Church's. That's when they start to throw things at him.

"Can we just call it?" Tucker asked.

"No, we're not going to leave. I would rather spend the day waiting than leave and let them think we ditch this meeting. Unless you want to know personally what it feels like to get your spine ripped out?" Church asked.

"Ugh! I'm so bored!!!" Tucker whined, slamming his head down onto the table.

"What are you two idiots doing in here? Slacking off again?" Someone said.

Tucker raised his head and realized he'd rather it be the Sangheilis at the door than Carolina. Standing there, judging them with her angry green eyes like they were the scum of the Earth. Which she has actually called them on numerous occasions. Church stood up so he could be at eye level with his sister, something that Tucker could understand. Carolina staring down at you could make a person feel like shit.

"What do you want Carolina?" Church asked.

"Oh nothing." She said innocently. "I'm just here to tell you the Sanghelios posse has just arrived, they're on their way up now."

"You're no messenger Carolina. Sheila could've easily came in here to tell me that. Seriously, what the fuck do you want?" Church demanded.

"It's never about what I want Church, it's always about what you want. You wanted to lead the deal between Command and Sanghelios, which I was fine with handing over. I hate their guts." She said.

"I never wanted it, and you didn't hand it over. They're a misogynistic group of assholes who wouldn't be caught dead making deals with women. Our father made you back down and forced me to clean up your mess." Church said. "And I wouldn't call having a bitch fit of monumental proportions 'being fine'."

"The details of that tragic tale don't interest me, Leonard." Carolina sniped, and Tucker cringed. Church hated being called by his first name. It was something reserved for his father and Carolina when she was pissed at him. "I'm just here to tell you that Dr. Church would like to see you after your meeting. He asked me to tell you directly so you can't just blow him off because you claimed that Sheila forgot to tell you or something."

That wasn't good news. Tucker knew the only reason Dr. Church ever called either of his children to his office was to reprimand them. It was like they were in elementary school and Dr. Church was the Principal. 

"Oh God, what does he want now?" Church groaned.

"I didn't ask." Carolina said.

"That's code for he didn't want to tell you." Church scoffed. If looks could kill, Church would be dead on the ground right now.

Carolina subtly growled. "Just make sure you don't piss him off more than average today. He's already in a bad mood."

"He's not in a bad mood Carolina, you just bring out that side of him." Church goaded. Tucker slowly started to sink lower and lower into his chair. For years these two loved to pick fights with one another. To break the subtle and thick tension between the two by making them go into a fit of rage was a victory for the victim. Even now Tucker wouldn't put it past Carolina to leap across the table and strangle Church. Maybe if he ducked under the table quietly no one would notice his disappearance. Jesus Christ, Tucker always hoped that the two of them would grow out of these terrifying displays, especially after they started working together, but they only got worse.

The tension seemed as if it were about to boil over until they heard deep and loud voices coming from down the hall and approaching them. That would be their partners. Carolina gave her brother one last stink eye before disappearing.

Tucker sat up straight in his chair. "Dude, was there ever a time when Carolina didn't hate your guts?"

"If there was, it's long gone now." There was a quick flash of something in Church's eyes that Tucker could only describe as sadness, but it vanished as fast as it appeared. Church slipped into his business face and stood up to politely greet the large and terrifying business partners.

Tucker met Church when they were both in their mid teens, so it was possible that Church and Carolina didn't hate each other before then. Tucker still wasn't exactly sure why they did hate each other now. Being an only child he just chalked it up as a sibling thing that he couldn't understand. But over the years, he realized it ran deeper than that, much deeper. But Church wasn't talking, and Tucker certainly wasn't asking. That would be too much drama to get involved, and he already had enough of that for one lifetime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's been a while since I've weaved a story that has an actual plot, character development, and wasn't a one-shot. But I love this pairing so much that I'm willing to try my hand at it. Please tell me what you think.


	3. Nice and Slow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you don't want to be nervous before a date, don't hang out with the friend who loves to screw with you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you may notice, this chapter is a bit shorter than the previous chapters. I didn't mean for that to happen and I apologize. I try to keep a quota of around five thousand words per chapter and this evened out to around three and a half thousand words.
> 
> The shortness of this chapter is because I realized it's been over a month since my last post so I cut this chapter a bit short and posted what I had already completed. I want to post at most once every month so as to no let it be one of those stories that get updated twice, goes on a year long hiatus, and gets deleted because the author lost the motivation to continue.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter. My schedule has been full these past couple months, but for the next couple of weeks I have nothing important going on so I'll try to write more.

Tucker finished styling his hair in order to get the perfect "I just rolled out of bed looking like this" look and zipped up his favorite aqua hoodie. He entered the living room where Church and Junior were waiting for him to return.

"Okay guys, does it look like I'm trying too hard?" Tucker asked as he stood in front of his son and friend.

Church rummaged through his large bag of chips and said, "Tucker, if you have to ask the question, "Does it look like I'm trying too hard", it means that you're trying too hard."

"Shut your face!" He turned to his son, "Junior, what do you think?"

Junior looked up from his plush space ship to look at Tucker. After a brief moment, he stuck out his tongue and blew raspberries at him and returned to his business.

"HAH! You just got burned by your own kid!" Church laughed with a mouthful of chips.

"He's two, what does he know about looking sexy?!" Tucker said, suddenly feeling very self conscious about how he looked.

"Dude, you're not some blushing virgin going to the prom." Church said. "You're just going on a date with a dude you had sex with the other day. A lot of people just call that a Tuesday night."

"Church, I haven't been on a legitimate date since Junior was born. That's two years I've been out of practice. What do people even do after dates anymore?" Tucker asked.

"How the hell should I know?" Church grabbed another hand full of chips. "In case you've already forgotten, I'm married. My struggles with going on first dates are over."

"Yeah, because yours and Tex's first date consisting of skipping school, sharing a six pack, and you trying to kiss her then getting punched in the balls should be the standard of every first date." Tucker said sarcastically.

"Ah, to be young again." Church reminisced. "Should've worn a cup on that date."

"So we've all agreed that maybe I shouldn't take advice from the guy who had to have an ice pack strapped to his junk for a week." Tucker started to smooth down his hoodie, and began to feel as if he should've worn something else.

"Would you just relax?! You look fine." Church smacked Tucker on the shoulder. "Have some chips."

"I bought those chips yesterday dude! Stop eating my food!" Tucker yelled.

"You don't pay me to watch your kid, I've earned these chips." Church ate another chip. "Stop being such a tight ass! You're blowing things way out of proportion."

"You think?" Tucker asked.

"Yes. So what happens if you blow this date? Metaphorically speaking." Church asked. "What's the worse that can happen? I mean, you'll only scare away the only guy in the tri-state area who's crazy enough to date you. You'll forever be afraid of any future date you may have so you will seclude yourself from anyone single. Then you will force your misbegotten fears onto your son who will then in turn never date, never move out, and you'll both die alone together."

"I thought this was supposed to help me!" Tucker cried. "You just made things worse!"

"I never said I was going to make anything better. Who said that?" Church smirked.

"... I fucking hate you." Tucker grumbled. "Now get out of here. I don't want you here when Wash comes over."

"Why? Embarrassed of me are we?" Church questioned.

"Yes I am. I am ashamed to know you, so get out of my apartment." Tucker stated bluntly.

"Well, you have no one to blame but yourself. You're the one who decided to fall in love with the guy who is chummy with Carolina. Now that's playing with fire right there." Church replied.

"Okay, first of all: I am not in love with him, love at first sight isn't real. And even if it were real, it doesn't happen at a bar when you're on the prowl for a good lay. Second of all: I didn't know he was friends with Carolina when we met. And even if I did know, it wouldn't have mattered. She might be my superior at work, but outside of it I can do whatever the hell I want and there's not a damn thing she can do about it." Tucker said.

"I'm your superior at work, you don't even listen to what I tell you to do." Church stated.

Tucker shrugged. "Yeah, well, start looking like Carolina and maybe I'll start listening to you."

"Oh, so Carolina already knows about you getting it on with her one of her closest friends?" Church asked.

Tucker hesitated. "Now I didn't say that. I just meant that I don't care what she thinks even if she did know about me and Wash."

Church whipped out his phone. "So, you won't care if I called up Carolina and told her about this little date of yours? I've got her number right here, just one tiny tap and-"

"You better put that phone away bitch before I knock it right out of your hand!" Tucker ordered.

Church pocketed his phone. "Hah! I knew it! You're so terrified of her."

"Yes Church. I'm a pussy for being afraid of having my balls crushed by Carolina."

"You're gonna wish you had a pussy after Carolina is through with you. You're the only other person she hates almost as much as she hates me. And that's saying something."

Tucker shuddered at the thought of being the main focus of Carolina's rage. He remembered one summer long ago back when Church and him were in high school together. During that summer it was hot as balls outside, like record breaking heat waves were hitting them. But Dr. Leonard Church was/is the king of industry, so not only could he afford to have air conditioning running at all times throughout his home, he also had a large pool in the back yard. Tucker probably spent more time at Church's house than at his own home. One day, Carolina was already swimming in the pool by the time they got there and wouldn't leave just because they didn't like being around one another. They accepted she wasn't going anywhere and proceeded to ignore her, or at least Church did. She was wearing a strapless teal bikini that showed off her curves in all the right places, and Church kept smacking Tucker across the face whenever he stared at her for too long.

And as great luck would have it-or terrible luck, however you want to look at it-the back strap holding the top of Carolina's bikini up broke and exposed her breasts to Tucker and Church. Tucker had a full two seconds to appreciate the sight of Carolina topless before Church tackled him into the pool to protect her modesty. It gave her enough time to grab her towel and run inside before Tucker could get a second look. Two hours later, the two boys had left the pool for food, and Carolina returned washed and fully dressed. She waited until he was alone, then she pinned Tucker to the fridge and pulled a grapefruit spoon out of her pocket.

"If you ever tell anyone what happened here today, I swear on all that is holy I will cut your eyeballs out with this spoon and shove them down your throat! Do I make myself clear?" She threatened. And Tucker knew she wasn't bluffing.

"Crystal!" Tucker answered. She accepted his promise, kneed him in the balls to get her point across, then walked out of the room as if nothing had happened. He told Church about her threat later, to which he simply responded that he had no business gawking at his sister in the first place.

Tucker never told anyone else about that day as he promised, but he still occasionally liked to remember Carolina's breasts in moments of privacy.

_*Knock Knock*_

Their heads snapped towards the front door. Wash was early. Fuck, of course Wash was early. Wash seemed to be the exact type of guy to show up to a date early rather than on time or fashionably late like every other normal person on the planet.

"Aw fuck, Church! You and Junior were supposed to be gone by now." Tucker whined.

"Too late now Tucker." Church laughed.

Tucker continued to stare at the door, not moving an inch.

"Well, don't stand there like a fucking idiot. Go answer the door before he leaves!" Church ordered.

Tucker walked up to the door and held his breath before opening it.

Fuck, somehow in the span of just a handful of hours since they had seen each other last he had somehow gotten hotter.

Wash stood there only wearing a black leather jacket, a grey shirt, dark blue jeans, and casual boots. So simple, but somehow it made him look irresistible.

"Hey." Wash greeted, giving him a nervous smile.

Tucker snapped out of his funk. "Uh, hi."

"I know I'm early, but I was already here, and I didn't want to be the creepy guy who hangs out in front of your building until it was actually time to show up." Wash admitted.

Tucker chuckled. "Yeah, but we've already got like five creepy guys hanging out in front of our building. No one would've noticed if there was one more."

Wash let out a genuine laugh. God, was it weird that Tucker wanted to lock them both in his room and have really hot sex all night long just because of that laugh? That cute, sexy, rugged piece of man was going to be the end of him.

They stood at the door staring at each other until Church decided to make his presence known.

"Well, isn't this nice?" Church said.

Wash looked over to him and realized that they weren't alone.

"Oh yeah, uh come in." Tucker invited.

Wash stepped inside and clenched up when he saw Junior staring daggers at him.

"Uh Wash, this is my neighbor Church. Church, this is Wash." Tucker introduced.

Wash held out his hand to shake, which Church accepted.

"Hey, Leonard Church. But you probably already knew that." Church said.

"Yeah, I remembered you yelled at us for making too much noise the other night. Sorry about that, by the way." Wash apologized.

"It's okay, I was mainly yelling at Tucker. He gets off on annoying me." Church said.

"Church." Tucker growled.

"So, I hear you're friends with Carolina." Church changed the subject.

"Well I was friends with her fiance York before he met her. But yeah, we've been friends for a while now." Wash explained.

"Have _you_ told her about this little date you two are going on?" Church asked.

Wash's face paled a little. "Um, no."

"And may I ask why you've neglected to tell my sister if you're such good friends with her?" Church grinned.

"Uh..." Wash struggled to come up with an answer.

"Church, stop being an asshole." Tucker ordered.

"I'm just trying to get to know you're new friend here. Lord knows that Tucker craves for my approval all the time." He said.

"Don't listen to him, he likes to bury his feelings in food." Tucker told Wash.

"And hey, you remember Junior, right?" Church gestured over to Junior.

Junior looked up at the sound of his name. When he saw Wash looking at him, he let out an inhuman hissing sound and ran over to clutch Tucker's leg.

This was strange for his son, because he generally liked people. Friends and strangers alike. Was that to say that Junior was the perfect child? Hell no, that kid was his own hurricane and earthquake wrapped into one. But there was something about Wash that made Junior go into a hostile defensive mode. Tucker didn't even think it was possible for a toddler to be considered "hostile", let alone his own kid.

"Sorry, he's probably just in a bad mood." Tucker said as he patted Junior on the head.

That was a lie, Junior was always in a good mood. That's what made him awesome.

"And it's weird, because it only seems to happen around you." Church said.

Wash's cheeks tinted pink. Alright, Church had to go _now_ before he scared Wash off and Tucker would have no choice but to kill him.

"Hey Church, do you think I should tell Carolina about that time you banged Tex in her office during last year's Christmas party?" Tucker threatened.

That certainly changed Church's tune. "Well, I should be going. C'mon Junior. Let's go to my place and watch Predator."

Junior's mood changed from hostile to excited in a snap. Church held out his hand to the boy which he eagerly grasped and proceeded to leave.

"But not the new one, he's never seen it and I want to watch it with him." Tucker reminded him.

"Yeah yeah. Have fun kids." Church closed the door on his way out.

With the two of them finally gone, it left Tucker and Wash alone. It wasn't really all that awkward, but neither of them were quite sure what to do next. Tucker patted his pockets and realized that he had forgotten his wallet in his room. He excused himself from the room, and went back to his bedroom. He contemplated if he could escape through his bedroom window and disappear into the night. Just have this guy hate him for bailing on him rather than avoid him after an awful date.

It probably wouldn't be such a good idea. They were on the top floor and the fire escape wasn't on this side of the building. And he probably didn't have the upper body strength needed to scale the building. Not to mention that he actually really liked Wash. What would be accomplished by ruining the date before it even got started?

He pocketed his wallet and walked back to Wash. When he reentered the room, he saw Wash looking at a picture he kept on his mantel. Rather than look at the pictures of him and Junior, it was the picture of his college graduation that caught Wash's attention. The picture was of himself, Church, and Caboose after they accepted their diplomas, still wearing their black graduation gowns.

"I didn't know you had dreadlocks." Wash commented.

Tucker was twenty one when that picture was taken and his hair was well past his shoulders back then. After high school he had no mandatory dress code rules to follow anymore, he decided to grow out his hair and have dreadlocks.

"Yeah, for a long time actually. But after Junior grew up a little he started yanking the hell out of them and shoving them in his mouth to chew on. So I had them cut off and have kept my hair short ever since." Tucker ran his fingers through his short wavy hair. He did miss having dreadlocks, but Junior had a crazy amount of strength in his baby fists that he was almost afraid of his hair being ripped right out of his scalp.

"Wow, who's the behemoth with you guys?" Wash asked.

"That would the freakishly strong and incident prone Caboose." Tucker answered. "I seriously think that Church would have never let Caboose hang out with us if he wasn't so willing to give him piggyback rides to class. God he was so lazy it's amazing that he's not two hundred pounds over weight by now."

Wash chuckled at this. Tucker walked across the room to Wash as he placed the frame back on the mantle.

Holding nothing back, he decided that the best move-strategy wise-was to catch Wash off guard and kissed the life out of him.

It was actually quite pleasing to surprise Wash like this. The sound that escaped his lips before they were sealed was a delightful achievement for Tucker.

His tongue had already began to plunder Wash's mouth, the inside of it tasting of mint and something unique that was utterly delicious for Tucker. Catching on rather quickly, Wash wrapped one are around Tucker's waist to yank him closer and entwined his fingers into his hair. Tucker stumbled a little, but seized the invitation to slide his hands under Wash's shirt, running his fingertips over his back muscles again. Tucker wasn't joking when he told Wash he was surprised that his clothes didn't rip off half the time. His physique was rather impressive. Washboard abs, mysterious scars, freckles on surprising parts of his body, and the equipment between his legs made Tucker wonder how a man like him could go a year without someone just jumping him on the street.

Oh God, he was losing focus. What was the point of this again? Tucker couldn't remember. All that was left in his head was how much he wanted Wash to be on top of him again. All hot, sweaty, naked, resting his weight upon him as he fucked him better than anyone had ever tried to in the past. He didn't even need to ask Wash if he felt the same way, he could feel the blond's rather large length pressed against his stomach through his own hoodie and Wash's jeans.

Wash pulled Tucker's head back so he could have better access to his throat, and started to lick and nibble from the top downward. He ran his fingernails hard down his back, to which Wash responded by giving a seductive bite on the crook of his neck. Tucker couldn't help but moan out as Wash's arm squeezed him as he began to run his tongue over where his teeth had left an imprint.

"Baby, if you wanted a repeat of the other night, all you have to do is say "please"." Tucker grinned.

Tucker really needed to learn when talking was necessary and when he needed to shut his God damn mouth, because his comment stopped Wash in his tracks. He pulled back so Tucker could look him in the eyes.

"As enjoyable as that sounds, I think we should stop here." Wash said.

Well, this was embarrassing. What was Tucker supposed to think with Wash's tongue down his throat and his arms around him? They weren't exactly mix signals in his opinion, it was clear what was transpiring between them. Now suddenly Wash hit the breaks on them? W.T.Fuck? He removed his hands from the inside of Wash's shirt and tried to take a step back.

"Did I do something wrong?" He asked.

"No! Oh God no! You're great. It's just that..." Wash trailed off. His cheeks were flushed, but not from arousal this time. "It's been a while since I've done this with anyone before. And I'm just going to say it: I like you and I really don't want to fuck this up. So maybe we should slow things down a bit."

Slow? Slow? What, were they in high school?! Slow?! Does that mean he would have to wait until the third date before holding hands in public? Did he have to get him a promise ring on their one month anniversary? Did they need to know each other for a year before giving their metaphorical virginity to each other? SLOW?! What the fuck does taking things slow accomplish?!

"I know it sounds really stupid and childish, but I think that if we jump the gun on this it could end up badly for the both of us. What's the harm of taking this slow?" Wash suggested.

The harm was that Tucker wouldn't be able have crazy hot sex with Wash until their relationship was "mature" enough, that's what! Was Wash lacking that much faith in them that he thought that fucking would screw up what was going on between them?

"So does that sound like something you could do for me?" He asked shyly.

NO! It certainly wasn't something that could be done! Wash was awesome and Tucker would have no problem agreeing to anything that would let him call him his, but this was asking for too much too soon. There was no way that Tucker could agree to his terms!

"Uh... sure. I can do slow." Tucker answered.

Wash let out a sigh of relief and smiled.

"Okay, that's great. So should we go?"

Wash opened he door for Tucker and they walked down the hall to the elevator.

Slow... okay. He could do slow. If it made Wash happy he could do that for him. No problem. This would be over in a snap once he could prove that he could play by Wash's rules. He would be the best at taking things slow!

Wash walked slightly ahead of Tucker so he snuck a peak at the jeans hugging his ass. He wanted nothing more that to give it a firm squeeze just to see Wash's cheeks turn that delicate shade pink he loved.

Oh who was he kidding?

He was so fucked.


	4. I Can't Quit You Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First dates don't always go smoothly. But this date is almost a complete train wreck!  
> Almost...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> An extra long and extra steamy chapter for my ever so patient readers. I'm writing this from what feels like my death bed so please excuse any grammatical errors.

Slow?

Slow?!

What the fuck was he thinking asking if they could take things slow?!

Wash didn't want to take things slow. He wanted to take Tucker out and bring him home to have hot and passionate sex. Hell, the only thing he could consider taking slow was to fuck Tucker hard and slow at the same time until he was begging for him to quicken his pace so he could cum. His eyes tightly shut, his mouth opened slightly, his hands clawing at his back, and his breathing shallow as Wash thrusted in and out so slowly that-Focus!

The point was he didn't want to take things slowly at all!

It was all York and North's fault. Only a few hours before the date they were pestering him with their own advice. How to act, what to talk about, begging him to leave his phone on speaker so they could listen in. But something that the two of them agreed on was that he needed to slow things down before they crashed and burned.

"Don't try to rush things, Wash." "You'll only make matters harder, Wash." "Everyone knows sex before commitment screws things up, Wash." "Wait until the time is right, Wash." "You need to listen to us, Wash." "We're so fucking smart and know everything, Wash."

That last one was sarcastic, but God! It was such a mistake to listen to them.

While they were fooling around earlier, Wash was two seconds away from throwing Tucker over his shoulder and carrying him to the closest surface he could fuck him on. But of course he suddenly began to hear York and North's voices in his head saying that it was going to be a mistake so in a panic he ended things before they even began. Seeing the look on Tucker's face as he rejected him was so heart wrenching that he wanted to throw out all of his good morals and get some new dirty ones.

Now that they were waiting for their table at the bar, Wash was resisting the urge to bang his head on the bar top for opening his big fat mouth.

"Oh yeah, I should probably say sorry for earlier." Tucker said.

Oh God, now he was sorry?! How was he fucking this up so much so soon?!

"Sorry?" Wash squeaked out.

"Yeah, for Church." Tucker clarified. "I know he can be a real asshole sometimes and that he was making you uncomfortable with all of those questions about Carolina."

Wash exhaled, "Oh yeah, him."

"He was just trying to fuck with you. He isn't going to actually tell Carolina about... us." Tucker said.

"Yeah... Carolina." Wash remembered.

There was another bout of silence between them.

"Let's be honest here Wash, Carolina hates me." Tucker confessed. "Since I've met her I've been on Church's side of their little family feud. I mean, when we did first meet I told her that her ass was out of this world and she punched me in the throat. So yeah, she's pretty much hated me from the beginning. And when we started working together, she's made it pretty clear that she doesn't want her work life to mix with her personal life no matter what. So let's face it; I'm restricted to her work life and you're restricted to her personal life."

"And if she finds out that we both crossed those boundaries, we're dead." Wash finished.

"Well you're her friend, isn't there a chance for some form of mercy if she finds out from you?" Tucker asked.

"You obviously don't know Carolina that well if you think I get special treatment just because we're friends."

"Oh I'm sorry. Have you ever been threatened with a grapefruit spoon just because you accidentally caught a glimpse of her topless once?"

"Wait, what?!"

"A story for another time! All I'm saying is that of the two of us, I'm the one at risk because not only does she hate me, I can't even run away from her if shit hits the fan because we work together."

"Well she's not a monster Tucker, she's just..."

"She's just Carolina."

Wash loved Carolina like the sister he never had and despite what most may think of her, she was actually quite pleasant to be around when she was in a good mood. However, he was utterly terrified of the possibility of being on her bad side. But that wasn't enough to stop him from pursuing Tucker.

"So we agree? We shouldn't let Carolina find out about us just yet?" Tucker asked.

 Wash took a deep breath and sighed, "I guess under the circumstances, it wouldn't hurt Carolina if we simply omitted certain truths from her."

Tucker exhaled all the tension from his shoulders; clearly this was something that had been bothering him for a while.

"You know, I'm not stupid. I know that Carolina can be a bit... overwhelming at times. But she's one of my closest friends and means a lot to me so she's going to find out sooner or later."

"How did you even meet her? I mean, I've never actually met any of her friends mainly because I figured she didn't have any of them."

"Hey."

"I'm serious. She once said that "I'll relax when I'm dead." No joke, she is the most deadly serious woman I have ever met."

"She's not that bad. I met her through her fiance York. And I met him back in when I was in military school."

Tucker choked a little bit on his drink. "Wait, what?! You went to military school?! Like as in those schools that take in troublesome kids and make them fit to join the military after graduation?"

"Relax. It wasn't like I was sent to a juvenile detention hall. It was like a regular school, but instead of suspension as punishment they made you do vigorous physical exercises that would crush your will to live."

"What the fuck did you do to get sent to military school, rob a bank?"

"I got into a lot of fights growing up. I didn't always start the fights, but I always got blamed for them. Then after some punk tried to corner me in the bathroom with a switch blade-"

"Jesus Christ!"

"Let me finish! I had beaten up some friend of his a few days previous so he wanted to "teach me a lesson" or something. So I broke his nose, his collar bone, a few fingers, gave him a concussion, and a black eye. And I left without a scratch so as far as the school and the kid's mother was concerned, I was just some bloodthirsty teen with a bad attitude."

"So they sent you to military school? Can they just do that, what about your parents?"

"Pff- as far as my parents were concerned I was a headache they didn't want or need, so they signed anything and everything to get the school off their backs and me out of their house. I'm just surprised that they didn't try to medicate or commit me or something."

"And that's where you met York?"

"Mmm hmm, and North."

"What the hell did they do, murder someone?"

Wash flagged down the bartender for another drink. "No, York had sticky fingers mixed with an impulse control issue but a fairly high IQ, so they thought his future could be "saved" by being sent to military school. North on the other hand was just bad luck. His sister South was at a hardcore high school party getting drunk, but when he got there to bring her home the party got busted by the police and everyone was arrested. Under-aged drinking earned her a one way ticket to boarding school and him military school."

"Jeez, you're like the band of misfit orphan rejects. They could make a movie about you guys."

"Who would watch a movie about us?"

"Wait. Your friend's name is North, and he has a sister named South?"

"His twin sister."

"What's their last name?"

"... Dakota."

"So there's Washington, York, Carolina, and North and South Dakota? You all are named after states?! My God, you can't pay for that kind of writing!"

"It's not their real names, dumb ass. What kind of awful parents name their kids North and South? It's just nicknames they got."

"Wait wait wait! What's your middle name?"

"Why?"

"Just tell me!"

Wash muttered under his breath. He didn't need to pour gasoline over the fire by telling Tucker what his middle name was. But Tucker wouldn't drop it so Wash confessed.

"It's Columbus."

Tucker laughed so hard tears actually came out of his eyes. Wash didn't find anything funny about his unfortunate name when kids throughout his school years made fun of him, and he certainly didn't find it funny now.

"David Columbus Washington?! Washington D.C.! You have the whitest full name ever!"

Wash had been called on numerous occasions a "whiny bitch" who can't take a joke by his friends, this may be one of those times.

"I'm going home." Wash declared, leaving the bar.

Tucker snapped out of his streak of laughter. "Oh c'mon Wash!" He said as he chased after him. "I was just teasing you! I like your full name, really!"

Wash wasn't really going to go home, he just wanted to make Tucker sweat a bit and teach him a lesson.

Unfortunately, when Tucker followed him outside, he accidentally swung the front door open too hard and into the face of an unsuspecting pedestrian.

"Oh fuck berries!" Tucker swore. "I didn't see you there! I'm-"

Tucker didn't get to finish his apology because the man-who upon closer inspection was fucking terrifying-grabbed him by the collar of his hoodie and yanked him close.

"What the fuck did you think you were doing?" The man asked in a low and dangerous voice. "I should crush you're fucking throat for nearly breaking my face like that!"

"Oh, double fuck berries!" Tucker cried.

Wash snapped into action. He pulled Tucker away from the man and stood between them. The man stood at least half a head taller than him, his eyes were almost black, and seemed to be more muscle than man. Plus the nasty scars covering half his face didn't help dampen the "murdery vibe" Wash was picking up from him. That still didn't stop him from protecting Tucker.

"Hey! It was an accident. He didn't do it on purpose." Wash said in a steady tone.

The man began to size Wash up, obviously looking to see if he could take him in a fight. "I don't care if it's an accident. The little fucker should look where he's going. I ought to teach him a lesson for smashing a door on my face."

"Believe me, it would've been an improvement on your face." Tucker not so quietly muttered under his breath.

The stranger wasn't going to get a chance to murder Tucker, because Wash was probably going to do it for him. It was like he wanted to get the crap beat out of him.

"You must have a death wish you fucking cunt!" The man tried to push Wash out of the way.

Wash didn't let him lay a finger on Tucker. He hooked his right arm under the man's left arm and his other arm over the man's right, and then proceeded to flip that asshole to the concrete.

"Fuck!" Tucker cried out in surprise.

Only the man wasn't down for the count just yet. He swung one of his big arms at Wash's legs and knocked him flat on his back. He took advantage of Wash's disoriented state as he leapt on top of him and proceeded to lay one solid punch on his face before he was suddenly gone.

Wash focused his vision and saw that Tucker had enough stupidity and courage to leap onto the giant's back and put him into what he could only assume was a poor attempt at a choke hold. The man spun around a bit, unsuccessfully trying to grab Tucker off his back before he rammed hard into the side of the building, sandwiching Tucker between the brick wall and the stranger. Tucker let out a dry gasp before he released his hold and gracelessly slid to the ground.

" _*cough*_ You asshole..." Tucker managed to say.

The man exposed his sharp teeth with a crooked smile as he pulled back his fist to punch Tucker. But lucky for him Wash was back on his feet, he grabbed the man by the hair and smashed his face into the wall. When the man was trying to regain focus, Wash took a second opportunity by harnessing his strength and sucker punched him in the face, which actually knocked the man to the ground. A tooth may have fallen out, but Wash wasn't willing to stick around and bask in the triumph of his victory. This fight was actually taking place on a fairly populated street and somebody would've called the police by know. He and Tucker both needed to get out of there before they were arrested for assault. Or even worse if the man wasn't down for the count and was getting ready for round two.

Wash grabbed Tucker by the hand and helped him up. "We need to get out of here."

"What about dinner?" Tucker asked.

"We'll order in. Now come on!" Still holding onto his hand, Wash lead them running down the street. They were pretty far away from Tucker's apartment, but not from his own. His apartment was only a handful of blocks away, but he neglected to disclose this bit of information when he and Tucker agreed on a location for dinner.

They ran a few blocks before they approached his building.

"Where are we?" Tucker asked.

"This is my apartment building. I figured we could stay here for now." Wash responded.

"Oh." Wash lead him inside and started walking up the apartment stairs.

"Are you okay?" Wash asked. "You looked like you took quite a hit."

"Am I okay?! Are you okay?" Tucker asked. "That guy looked strong enough to bend steel with his bare hands! And he punched you in the face!"

"What this?" He motioned to his already bruised cheek. "I've had worse. The guy fought like an amateur."

When they reached the fourth floor, Wash turned down the hall that lead towards his apartment.

"Seriously, are you okay?" Wash repeated.

"Psh. Tex has smacked me around way worse than that guy. She could teach him a thing or two on beating the shit out of a guy." Tucker joked. "Speaking of which; where did you learn to fight like that?"

"When you've got an angsty attitude like I did in military school, you need to learn actual fight moves otherwise you'd get destroyed in there. York and North taught me what they could to keep me on my feet, Carolina taught me the rest later." At his door, he unlocked it and lead Tucker inside.

Wash turned on the lights. "Well, it's a good thing that- holy shit!" Tucker exclaimed.

Wash looked around, trying to see what shocked Tucker.

"You're apartment is like a neat freak's wet dream, Wash!" Tucker said.

"Oh, yeah. I don't really like messes or disorganization." He said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Really? Because I would not have been able to guess that based off of this room." Tucker joked

It wasn't the first time someone had commented on how he kept his apartment. Yes, some may call him a neat freak, but Wash liked to think that he had a certain standard when it came to how his home looked. Everything had a place, and everything was in its place. But that didn't stop all of his friends from making fun of him.

"Alright, I get it. I know that it's a bit much, but it's the way I am. It's not like I would freak out if one thing is out of place. I just like it like this." He said.

"I'm not saying that it's a problem. It's just that... I'm afraid to step anywhere. Everything is so clean." Tucker admitted.

Wash laughed. "It's alright. I'm a bit overly organized, but I'm not OCD or anything."

He motioned for Tucker to sit down on the couch while he went to the kitchen to grab two bags of frozen peas.

He sat down with Tucker and held out one bag while he pressed the other to the side of his face.

"Here, for the back of your head." Wash said.

"Thanks." Tucker accepted the bag and held it against his head. "How's your face?"

"It probably looks worse than it is." He said.

"It's already turning purple." Tucker commented.

Tucker set down his own frozen bag and grabbed hold of Wash's. He pressed it firmly against the center of the bruise, and ran his fingers through his blond hair. At first Wash felt confused as to what he was doing, but realized that he was probably checking his head for other bruises from his fall. It actually felt rather nice. He closed his eyes and leaned into the bag of peas, finally feeling himself unwind after their hectic evening. And it wasn't even eight o'clock.

He opened his eyes when Tucker's hand stopped moving at the back of his head, his hand then dropped down to his lap. Tucker's face was downturned.

"I'm sorry for how this played out Wash." Tucker apologized. "If I wasn't an asshole in the restaurant, we wouldn't have gone outside and none of this would have happened."

"You couldn't have predicted that a of all the thousands of people you would hit in the face with a door would be a psycho. And it's not like you did it on purpose." Wash said. "And while you were being a bit of an asshole, I wouldn't have actually left you there."

"Yeah, well, now you're face is dented, there's one more person I have to avoid on the streets, and the night is pretty much ruined. I think this is the fastest and worst way I've ever ruined a date." Tucker confessed.

"Really, the worst?" Wash asked.

"... Okay, maybe not the worst, but it was still a pretty bad night." Tucker said.

"Don't be so dramatic Tucker, he night isn't ruined."

Tucker looked up. "It's not?"

"No. We can order in, talk, and you'll probably get into less trouble in here than out there." Wash said.

Tucker laughed. "Yeah, I was kind of asking for it out there, wasn't I?"

"You kind of were. I was pretty close myself to smacking you across the face to get you to shut up." Wash confessed.

"It wouldn't have been the first time you smacked me. But that wasn't on the face, now was it?" Tucker joked.

This comment made Wash's face flare red.

"You just got the life knocked out of you, and you want to talk about rough sex?!"

"Wash, if you've learned anything about me, it's that there's always room to talk about sex. And even more room for actual sex."

"I've noticed."

"My appetite for sex is endless."

"I've noticed that too."

The whole time they're talking, Tucker crawled up into Wash's lap, wrapping an arm around his neck while still using the other to keep the peas pressed to Wash's cheek.

"So I figure you should know before we get started that I'm gonna always want to talk about sex. It's my second favorite pastime." Tucker said.

"What exactly are we getting started on now?" Wash asked.

"My first favorite pastime." Tucker said just before he kissed him.

His mouth tasted like peppermint, savory peppermint. Like he somehow discreetly ate a whole box of dinner mints. His lips were also deceptively soft, Wash almost didn't notice with how aggressively he was kissing him. It was like Tucker was in some sort of race, as he wasted no time before nudging his tongue into Wash's mouth. Wash felt as if his body was catching fire, his self control being seriously tested by Tucker pressing his body tight against his. All that was between them was just a few layers of clothes. Easily disposable. Not to mention all of the boxes of unused condoms in his bedroom nightstand were just begging to be opened, all he had to do was-

"Wait, Tucker." Wash said, lips still pressed to Tucker's.

"What?" Tucker asked, not slowing down even a little. He diverted his attention to Wash's neck.

"What are you doing?" Don't get distracted! Don't get distracted!

"I thought we were laying down the ground work for the beginnings of sex, but it sounds like you're gonna suggest we stop." Despite this statement, Tucker didn't slow down his attack at Wash's neck. He felt Tucker’s hand tug at his blond hair, as the other hand slipped under his shirt. He moaned softly at the feeling those soft fingers on his stomach.

He sternly pulled at Tucker's hair until he finally looked at him. "I thought we agreed to slow things down."

"I am slowing down!"

"This is slow?!"

"Yes! This is very slow for me! If it were up to me, we'd already be on the floor naked and I'd be riding you like I was in the Kentucky Derby."

Tucker had a way of saying things that made Wash's brain be wiped clean, in both a good way and a bad way. Like when they first had sex. When Wash finally removed his briefs, in his aroused and drunk addled state, Tucker cried out, "Hey! You're a natural blond!" Wash wasn't sure what to do with this comment, but pushed it out of his head when Tucker launched himself forward and eagerly swallowed his cock. So when Tucker says he wants to ride him like a stallion, it almost makes him forget why he was trying to stop him in the first place. Almost.

"This isn't the kind of slow I had in mind." Wash said.

"C'mon baby. I can't help myself. Seeing you take out that guy back there with your bare hands, without even breaking a sweat. It's a big turn on, I'm not gonna lie. Let's put that strength to a more recreational use." Tucker admitted.

Wash would address the pet name situation later. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were trying to seduce me into forgetting about our agreement."

"If that hasn't been made clear, I could be more obvious if you'd like." Tucker said before planting another kiss on his lips. "We can still take this thing slow, but just have lots of sex in between."

"But-"

"Honestly Wash. What's the worse that could happen? It's not like we're in kids anymore! We're grown ups who make grown up decisions. Now take off your clothes and let's get down to business!"

He had made a valid point. They were both consenting adults who were capable of making their own decisions. Why was he letting the opinions of others get in the way of what he wanted to do? Or who in this case.

"I'm a grown up, you're a man child." Wash retorted.

"That may be true, but I still-" He grabbed at Tucker's hips and swiftly laid him flat on the couch knocking the bag of peas from his hand, Tucker didn't even bother to hide his shit-eating grin of triumph. He pressed a harsh kiss against his lips and gripped the hem of Tucker’s sweater and shirt with both hands, and yanked them both up and over his head.

"Wow, you waste no time do you?" Tucker asked surprised.

Wash stopped moving. "Are you seriously complaining right now?"

"No, I'm just-"

"Then shut up." Wash demanded and grabbed his hair, dragging him close to for a hard kiss, and got some silence by shoving his tongue into his mouth.

Tucker responded eagerly to the kiss, and even started thrusting his hips upwards. But then his body went stiff and he began trying to push Wash away.

"Baby- baby, stop." Tucker said against his lips.

Wash leaned up and took all of his weight off of Tucker's body. "I'm sorry, was that too rough?"

He was actually concerned that he went a step too far.

Tucker reached underneath his back like he was looking for something. "No, it's just-" Then he unveiled one of the bags of peas Wash grabbed earlier from behind him.

"Ah ha! There it is." Tucker dropped the bag to the ground. "Sorry, it was really cold and bugging the crap out of me."

He settled back down and motioned to Wash that he was ready to continue.

"Come on, what are you waiting for? I'm ready." Tucker whined.

Wash rolled his eyes before laying back on top of him. "You are impossible, you know that?"

"Really? Because I've heard that I'm easy. I'm very easy." Tucker joked.

Wash reached between Tucker's legs and grasped him firmly. This elicited a needy moan from Tucker.

"If you don't learn to keep your mouth shut, I'm going to have to teach you a lesson you won't soon forget." Wash threatened.

Tucker shivered at his statement and clutched the back of Wash's jacket tight. "Oh God. Dude, Cop fantasy was at the top of my list but I think Teacher fantasy just jumped up past it. Say that again while I'm bent over a desk or something and I'm done for."

As much as it pleased him to hold that much power over Tucker, Wash couldn't help but realize that they were about to have sex on a very nice couch that he paid a lot of money for, which would most likely ruin it by the end of the night. And given the last time they had sex, they were going to need more room than his couch could provide.

"We'll talk about this more after we go to my room." Wash promised.

"Now you're speaking my language." Tucker smiled.

As they quickly walked to his room, Wash neatly hug his jacket on the bedroom's door hook and stripped off his shirt.

Tucker leapt onto the bed and gawked at Wash. "Mmh, I'll never get sick of this sight. You should really just stop wearing clothes all together from now on."

Wash laughed. "And what about the other hundreds of people who will see me walking around naked and will call the cops?"

"You'll be arrested because it can't be legal to be that sexy."  Tucker bit his lip as his eyes raked over Wash's form.

Wash knew he was fit, he worked hard to maintain his physique. He usually had to ignore the advances made at him by several of his customers when he was at work. But now that he had Tucker, it felt nice to be desired like that again.

"You know just how to make a guy swoon." Wash rolled his eyes before taking off his jeans along with his socks and shoes.

He joined Tucker on the bed and resumed their shenanigans. Wash pushed his thigh between Tucker's legs as they kissed, causing him to whimper into his mouth before he started to roll his hips against Wash's thigh. This motivated Wash to angle his whole body between his legs and started rutting his hips forwards between Tucker's.

When they detached to breath, Tucker ran his fingers over the imperfections of Wash's skins.

"You've got some impressive scars, man."

Tucker lightly stroked a particular scar that ran across his right shoulder blade that made his stomach clench.

Wash wasn't per say ashamed of his scars, but he would prefer to forget they were there. Especially some of his more recent scars.

As if Tucker felt Wash tense up at the mention of his skin's flaws, he leaned up and kissed the bridge of his nose.

"But I think I like your freckles more. They really pop out when you blush." He smiled, causing Wash to blush from the comment. "Just like that. You look like you're sixteen."

"Thanks, I guess." Wash said.

"Learn to take a compliment, jeez." Tucker rolled his eyes.

"I'll try my best." Wash laid a sweet kiss on Tuckers lips before starting a trail down his neck.

His journey lead him down to his chest where he shifted gears before dipping his head and taking one of Tucker's dark nipples into his mouth.

Wash sucked gently on his nipple before flicking his tongue against the hardened flesh. Tucker cried out and arched his back, he tangled his fingers into his blond hair and held him close against his chest, clenching his legs around Wash's waist. Wash sucked a little harder, enjoying the sounds of Tucker moaning in ecstasy. He left a trail of wet kisses as he switched to the other nipple, he ran his tongue around the flesh before sucking on it hard. Tucker was writhing against him, and seemed to have trouble stringing together a sentence, as he could only seem to say random words and phrases.

It wasn't until Wash clamped his teeth hard on his nipple that Tucker practically screamed out his name as his entire body jerked against Wash's as he came.

Wash raised his head to look Tucker in the eyes. “Did you really come just from me sucking on your nipples?”

He couldn't deny it even if he wanted to. Wash could feel the evidence seeping through Tucker's jeans. It was ridiculously arousing for some reason.

Tucker was still flushed, whether it was from his abrupt orgasm or from embarrassment was unclear. "I told you, I have like _really_ sensitive nipples."

"When did tell me that?" Wash asked.

"The first time we had sex! Remember?" Tucker said.

"Not really. You don't speak clearly when you're like that." Wash said.

"Well now you know. If you want me to last longer next time, don't play with them so much. It was like you were trying to torture information out of me!" Tucker scolded.

"Torture huh? You certainly have a lot of sass for someone who just came in his pants like he was a teenager." Wash replied.

Tucker began to rub his thigh against Wash's still hard cock.

"You're never gonna let me live this down are you?" Tucker asked.

"I plan to exploit the hell out of this tidbit of information." Wash joked.

"Then I'll just have to make sure you forget about it." He whispered he slid out from the bed to stand while taking off his jeans and underwear.

Standing there stark naked, Wash turned over onto his back to better take in Tucker's form. He must certainly manscape the upper half of his torso regularly, as it was smooth and devoid of hair. But below his navel was a trail of dark hair leading to his flaccid cock. But hard or not, it didn't slow Tucker down when he jumped back onto the bed and on top of Wash's calves.

He pulled down his grey briefs to reveal his very interested and swollen cock. It laid flat against his stomach hard and red, and leaked pre-ejaculate from the tip, pooling on his stomach. He licked at the tip of Wash’s cock before taking hold of the shaft with his right hand and sucked the head into his mouth eagerly. He slowly moved his tongue along the underside of his cock, polishing off any more liquids emerging from the tip. The sudden abruptness of Tucker's actions caused Wash to jerk his hips hard upwards.

Tucker used both hands to hold down Wash's hips and used his mouth to do all the work. He lowered his head deep down and took the whole shaft into his mouth and seemed to be humming with pleasure. Wash gasped at the incredible sensation and his head lolled back as his fingers wrapped themselves in Tucker's dark hair. He writhed on the bed, drowning in ecstasy, dry-mouthed and hoarse from the loud moans and jumbled nonsense Tucker was eliciting from him. He couldn’t keep his body still even if he tried, his back arched up as far as it could, his hands fisted and tugged at Tucker's hair.

He kept on taking Wash down his throat like it was a national past time until a few minutes later, his mouth abandons its mission.

"Okay, so we have two options." Tucker breaths out and rests his face on Wash's left thigh. "We can either get things rolling now and hope that having you fuck me will be enough to get me hard again. Or we put that off till morning and I finish you off here and now. What do you want to do?"

Wash paused and tried to look like he was giving the ultimatum deep thought. He then looked down at Tucker and saw that his eyes were a crisp aqua, his dark hair was disheveled, his lips were swollen, and he was absolutely perfect.

"Be honest, if I were to say I wanted to wait until morning, would you actually be willing to do it?" He asked.

"Well... yeah. I mean, if it means that much to you that we wait, I could do it." Tucker said.

"Really? Even if I asked you to wait six months until I was ready?"

"You're not really asking me to wait six whole months are you?"

"Just answer the question."

" _*sigh*_ ...Yeah. I'd wait for you."

"... Okay."

Tucker sat up a bit. "Okay? Okay what?"

"'Okay' as in let's have sex. Tonight." Wash declared.

"Wait- really?!" Tucker asked.

"Yeah. I've got some stuff in my nightstand." Wash gestured over to the side.

"Really! Oh fuck yeah man!! This is awesome!!" Tucker cheered.

Tucker clambered over him and threw open the nightstand's drawer.

"Fucking hell Wash! What is this?!" Tucker exclaimed as he pulled a couple of items from the drawer.

One was a large box containing at least twenty different boxes of condoms in a variety of colors, flavors, and ribbing, and an extra large bottle of lubricant.

"I though you said haven't had sex in a while. What's with all these condoms?!" Tucker asked.

"Um... well, York buys me condoms every now and then so I'm prepared in case I ever did meet someone. I always just threw them in that drawer because I didn't need them. Until now of course." He calmly explained.

"And this monster bottle of lube?"

"... Look, I have needs. And instead of continuously buying regular sized bottles, it's more convenient to just get one really big bottle of lube."

"You really jerk off so much you need this much lube?!"

"Tucker, do you really want to go into my masturbation regularities, or do you want to have sex?"

"Sex, defiantly sex."

"Then pick a condom and get over here."

Tucker eagerly ripped open a box and yanked out a condom.

He laid Tucker flat on his back and slid himself between his legs. Wash snapped open the cap of the bottle and poured a fair amount onto his fingers. He then snaked his hands between his legs and eased his first finger in, the perfect mixture of gentle and demanding, stretching Tucker skillfully before slowly nudging a second finger in to join the first. His fingers spread him wider still, encouraging him to relax. Tucker's tired cock began to twitch in some interest, but not entirely hard yet. But that only motivated Wash to probe deeper and spread his fingers further.

Tucker turned his head into the pillow beneath him. His breathing shallow and fast, his face was hot and damp with sweat. His moans were so needy and dare he say, slutty, Wash almost wanted to lose control and start fucking him before it was time.

"Wash..." Tucker panted. "C'mon Wash. Just do it already."

He slipped in a third finger and curled them all against his prostate. Tucker's whole body seized up, his back arching off the bed as if he had been electrocuted. Wash relaxed his fingers inside of him, this in turn allowed Tucker's body to calm down.

But this act of mercy was short lived as Wash lightly ran his lips over Tucker's left nipple once again before enveloping it back into the heat of his mouth. Tucker let out a pathetic cry, and started writhing below him again. Tucker entwined his hand's into Wash's blond hair and began to tug at it. Whether it was to pull him away or as a sign of pleasure was unclear, so he gave one last mischievous suck and released the tight flesh from his mouth.

Wash looked down at Tucker and saw that he looked completely and utterly sinful, his breathing was fast and his gorgeous aqua eyes were wide and dark with pleasure. He slowly removed his fingers from Tucker and snatched the condom from his hand. As he tore the foil wrapper open with his teeth, Tucker's moans grew louder with anticipation.

"Oh God, baby please! I need you." Tucker whined.

After he quickly applied the fresh condom one-handed, Wash positioned himself between Tucker's legs, ready to penetrate him. But first he leaned in close to his ear.

"How bad do you want me?" He asked coyly.

"Really bad." Tucker cried out urgently, thrusting his hips upwards and wrapped his legs around his waist.

With a firm hand, Wash settled Tucker's eager hips back down onto the bed.

"How bad?" He asked again, with more of a commanding tone.

"Are we really gonna do this now?"

"Answer me or I'll leave you like this!"

"You wouldn't!"

"I would!"

Tucker clenched his eyes shut and gasped out, "So bad! I need you in me so much, I feel like I might die if you don't do it now! Please baby, no more! Please!"

That was just enough begging to fill Wash with satisfaction. He kissed a delicate trail to Tucker's mouth and captured his lips in a brief but passionate kiss.

"Now was that so hard?" Wash asked playfully as he thrusted his cock forward and deep within Tucker.

Wash bit his lip to keep from moaning out loud as his cock was enveloped in tight, wet, perfect heat, but Tucker was being loud enough for the both of them.

He hadn't even started to thrust and yet Tucker's screams were almost inhuman and could rival that of any porn star's. It almost brought upon concern of what his neighbors must be thinking. The screams could be mistaken for someone being beaten or murdered, but Wash couldn't actually bring himself to care at the moment what conclusions his neighbors came to as he gripped Tucker's hips and his began to thrust into the younger man's body.

After settling in, Wash set a fast, brutal rhythm that left Tucker howling out something that sounded vaguely like his name.

He felt his abdomen begin to clench and tighten with arousal, but was unwilling to finish before Tucker.

So it only motivated Wash to cheat and tugged one of Tucker's oversensitive nipples. Tucker began to whimper and shake as he came for a second time that night. When the pulsing of his muscles began, along with the mixture of Tucker's howling, the feeling of hot semen on his stomach, and him clawing at his back, Wash knew he was done for.

He gave one, two, three more thrusts before letting out a howl of his own and came deep within Tucker, filling the condom.

Wash held his position for almost a minute as he rode out his climax before nearly collapsing onto of Tucker, catching his weight with his forearms.

After catching his breath, Wash pulled out of Tucker who could only give out a whimper. He tied up the condom and threw it in the wastebasket by the bed.

Then he opened his nightstand drawer, pulled out some wet naps, and began to clean them both up.

"Dude, you keep wet naps in your drawer?" Tucker groaned out, clearly exhausted.

"Yes, because I am not a savage." Wash answered as he threw out the last of the wet naps.

"You're such a nerd." Tucker laughed before rolling on his side and passing out.

Wash didn't mind, he simply curled up next to him and pulled up the bed sheets.

"Well, I'm the nerd who fucked you into unconsciousness." Wash thought smugly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For some reason when I wrote this, I imagined Sharkface with a Scottish accent. I think I've been watching too much Outlander lately. Hope you've all enjoyed this and stay tuned for the next chapter.


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